Doused in Ghee

Wining and Dining in five star hotels gets rather boring after a couple of times. You've seen one 5* hotel, you've seen them all. The trick to really enjoying local culture and blending into the real spirit of India is in doing things as locals do.

One of the things I discovered in one such gastronomic adventure was the freshly brewed coffee at the local Darshinis. Till date, I make a beeline to a tiffin house whenever I want some good coffee.

One day, a friend took me to Vidyarthi Bhavan in Jayanagar for ghee-dosa. I'm not a big fan of dosas, least of all one that's got ghee in it - what with my unsuccessful attempts at keeping the rapidly expanding waistline in check - but I tagged along anyway.

VB is a rather tiny place for one of the most popular dosa joints in Bangalore. They have strict timings too. Often, the place has a huge queue long before opening time (that's 6 a.m folks). I was rather amazed. What killed me though, came next.




A ghee dosa to end all ghee dosas! This dosa broke all traditional norms - it was small, it was crisp and brown, it was thick and it had ghee pouring out of it like sambhar. It was served with coconut chutney and some potato dish.

The mere sight of this plate was enough to fill my tummy. As my friend grinned at my deer-in-the-headlight stare, I gingerly poked a finger through the hot dish and pinched out a mouthful.

Once that morsel had passed my lips though, there was no turning back. It was about as tasty as it could ever get. I motioned to the waiter to keep them coming while I gobbled them up faster than you could blink.

After a mighty fruitful (or should I say dosa-ful) half hour, I was on my way out to the mall, fully tanked up to do some heavy duty shopping!

And the hell with the waistline!

Strange phenomena

Yesterday, when I had gone to the terrace to stroll in the cool breeze, there was neither coolness or any good breeze blowing. However, there was something I am not likely to forget for quite some time.

Millions and millions and zillions of crows.

I shook my head, polished my glasses, blinked my eyes and looked again.

Yep. Millions and millions and zillions of crows. Big, black and purposeful crows. Low flying, high flying and seated crows. Cawing, quiet and fighting crows. As far as the eye could see the sky was just buzzing with crows.

I tried to find some pattern to this horror scene, but there was none. The crows were flying all over buildings, in all the areas as far as the eye could see. This couldn't be good, I thought. What if they have sensed some natural disaster waiting to happen and are agitated? What if there's going to be lightning striking down on the earth? Or maybe an earthquake? Or perhaps an unseasonal downpour? What if there's a huge storm?

I shuddered and tried to get those nasty images out of my mind. One thing I agreed was true and that was these crows looked agitated. This was no wassup-dude-long-time-no-see flying match. This was an out and out oh-my-god flying style.

I kept observing the crows for about an hour and watching out for any change in signs. I was still troubled at this inexplicable phenomenon. Then suddenly, all the crows disappeared.

My cellphone chimed. It was my friend from a different country.
"Yeah?"
"Hey, you won't believe what I saw today"
"You won't believe what I saw today" I replied thinking I had a much better story to tell. "You go first though. Wassup?"
"There were a million crows flying about an hour ago....."


I gave up. There were somethings the mind shouldn't even attempt explaining.

Ten things I carry in my purse

1. Sleeping bag/blanket/pillow
2. Mousetrap
3. Dish antenna
4. Coconut
5. Cymbals
6. Pocket TV
7. Samurai sword
8. Ball of wool
9. Half a chopstick
10. Cooling glasses

Nine Yards of Trouble

So you think wearing a sari comes naturally to women? Hah! Not on your life. When 'normal' things are applied in my context, they cease to be normal anymore. The laws of physics can hold good only so much after all.

I had to attend my best friend's engagement and turn up in a sari. The mere thought of it gave me sleepless nights for a month. When the E-day finally arrived, I was probably more nervous than the bride-to-be. The parlour lady had to tie and retie my sari twice because I wouldn't stand still. Then she poked me with a million pins to keep my sari in place. All this time, I was undergoing torture with a big smile pasted on my face. At least my friend was going to go through worse, I thought sadistically when I saw her making faces in the mirror.

There, so now I was all decked up. But don't ask me to move!

Musing

Mmmm......mm..........MMMMMMMMMMMMM..........mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....mmmmmMMM....M.....mmmmm.......zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Numerology

In college, I was facinated with the divine numbers - Phi, pi, i, Armstrong number, angstrom number, Plank's constant, Kelvin...the list was endless. I decided to add a few other definitions to this ever-increasing list.

1. Hugh Jackman number - the number that has the most perfect symmetry no matter how badly written. Often, among a bunch of numbers, this number stands out in all its glory.

2. Jay Leno number - the number that just can't stop talking.

3. Superman number - the number that reduces other numbers to zero upon performing a mathematical operation.

4. Tom and Jerry number - the numbers that always go in pairs.

5. Peter Sellers number - the number that takes different forms in different mathematical operations and is generally recognised for popping out in the most unexpected of results.

6. Rambo number - the number that when used effectively in a division operation, reduces all complex mathematical formalae to 1.

7. Sharon Stone number - the number that is generally used as a decoy in trick questions. It has the ability to distract the student from the right answer.

8. George Bush number - this is not a number really. Its another word for "question mark".

9. Pamela Anderson number - erm....46-24-36?

10. Kate Moss number - the number that remains the same no matter how much you add or multiply it. Also called "size zero".