Tchah!

Few things can be as all-pervasive, all-encompassing and altogether difficult to respond to when faced with an insolent "Tchah!"

Now you know why Tchah happens to be one of my favourite words. Here is a step-by-step guide on appropriate usage of Tchah that you will not find in dictionaries and thesaruses of this world. Read on and educate yourselves you ignoramii (plural of ignoramous).

Note the pronounciation and volume in these words below.

1. When boss asks you if you are happy with your salary - "TCHAH!!"
2. When your 'friends' suggest you pay the bill in the fanciest restaurant this side of the universe - "TCHAH!"
3. When you are trying to catch the 12:10 local and bump your elbow in a sumo wrestler's face - "tchah!"
4. When you are patiently waiting for the traffic signal to turn green and the guy behind you is honking - "TCHAH!"
5. When your mother-in-law rattles of reams of instructions on what she wants you to bring home from the supermarket - "tchah!"
6. When your girlfriend tries to explain that she was merely counting the blades of grass on the lawn with that handsome guy - "tchah!"